Okay, I know that people will start a GoFundMe for just about anything these days, and it’s hard enough trying to come up with the funds to feed yourself let alone some stranger’s quest to visit every pancake house in Norway.
Still, every now and then, you come across a plight so great that it’s impossible to ignore. Like Liam Smyth’s, who recounted the best first date story in history, which led to a broken window in his home that needed replacing.
His story begins innocently enough with the line “I recently took a girl I met on tinder to Nandos. We had a lovely evening, and enjoyed each other’s company very much. After our meal, we repaired back to my house for a bottle of wine and a scientology documentary.”
But it’s not long until things take a turn. A really weird, embarrassing, smelly turn.
“About an hour in to Louis Theroux and chill, my date got up to use the toilet. She returned with a panicked look in her eye, and told me she had something to tell me. “I went for a poo in your toilet,” she told me, “and it would not flush. I don’t know why I did this, but I panicked.”
“I reached into the toilet bowl, wrapped it in tissue paper, and threw it out of the window.”
But wait, this is only the beginning. Basically, the window she had thrown her offending package from did not open to a garden, but instead to a gap between the wall and another window, meaning unless she slid herself into the gap and pulled it out, it would be stuck there… forever.
Of course, the gap was too small for a human to reach into, but she still tried. Head first. Of course, she got stuck.
“She had been upside down in the window for around 15 minutes at this point, and I was starting to grow concerned for her health. I called the fire brigade.”
The fire brigade turned up, spent another 15 mins pulling her out, which resulted in the broken window.
Can you even imagine the embarrassment? You can read his full account here. No word yet on if there’s going to be a date number 2. Ha!