Good news, everyone! We don’t need to worry about the environment anymore.
According to NASA and their massive telescopes, there’s a star around 40 light years away, give or take, and it has not one but SEVEN Earth-sized planets orbiting it. Follow-up reports say some of them might even have water on their surfaces, and three of the planets are located in what scientists call “the habitable zone” and the rest of us call “the spot where we won’t immediately die”.
So… basically we’ve just taken the first step towards building our interstellar empire.
Which means we can abandon this rubbish tip and start fresh on a fancy new planet, leaving the cockroaches and kangaroos to deal with global warming or melting-down nuclear plants or plastic-infested oceans or whatever.
Now all we have to do is invent faster-than-light space travel, fight a few cheeky wars over who’s going to own which bit of which of the three liveable planets – oh, and maybe wage an extra war over what we’re going to name them.
The star itself is called TRAPPIST-1, which has a nice monkish feel to it – although A•STAR sounds like a much more inclusive option…